Loew's Theater presents ``Where the Boys are,'' an MGM picture produced by Joe Pasternak and directed by Henry Levin from a screenplay by George Wells. The cast:

Since the hero, a sterling and upright fellow, is a rich Brown senior, while two Yalies are cast as virtual rapists, I suppose I should disqualify myself from sitting in judgment on ``Where the Boys are,'' but I shall do nothing of the sort.

Instead -- and not just to prove my objectivity -- I hasten to report that it's a highly amusing film which probably does a fairly accurate job of reporting on the Easter vacation shenanigans of collegians down in Fort Lauderdale, and that it seems to come to grips quite honestly with the moral problem that most commonly vexes youngsters in this age group -- that is to say, sex.

The answers the girls give struck me as reasonably varied and healthily individual. If most of them weren't exactly specific -- well, that's the way it is in life, I guess. But at least it's reassuring to see some teenagers who don't profess to know all the answers and are thinking about their problems instead.

``Where the Boys Are'' also has a juvenile bounce that makes for a refreshing venture in comedy. There are some sharp and whipping lines and some hilariously funny situations -- the best of the latter being a mass impromptu plunge into a nightclub tank where a ``mermaid'' is performing.

Most of the female faces are new, or at least not too familiar. Dolores Hart, is charming in a leading role, and quite believable. I was delighted with Paula Prentiss' comedy performance, which was as fresh and unstilted as one's highest hopes might ask. A couple of the males made good comedy, too -- Jim Hutton and Frank Gorshin.